Holistic-Life Parts Work is the name for the psychoeducation I use with my clients in therapy. This name is not trademarked, and it consists of many evidence-based theories and my own experience with these theories combined and working together.
Every counseling theory has its unique view of where people's "problems" come from, what healing looks like, and the nature of what it means to be human. Holistic-Life Parts Work views pathology as a result of being dependent on an energetic extreme. When we are stuck in an energetic extreme, pathology is created as we cannot engage with the natural cycles of life. We are stuck resisting parts of ourselves and others. When we get comfortable with varying parts inside of ourselves, our competency to engage with our issues and issues in the world expands. When we have a comfortability with our parts, we can embrace them and integrate the wisdom that these parts have. Therefore, a lot of our "problems" are expressions of being stuck in living unidimensionally. The goal of therapy for Holistic-Life Parts Work is to have a balanced and whole perspective instead of being overly reliant on energetic extremes.
Usually, people come to counseling because their adaptations or strategies for responding to life are no longer working for them, or at least not without a large cost. We have relied on our strengths for too long, and we don't have any other option but to double down on what is familiar. Holistic-Life Parts Work allows us to expand into unfamiliar places, and make them familiar, comfortable, and integrated parts of our life.
The process of Holistic-Life Parts Work works in three phases. 1.) Identify the first energetic extreme. What are its strengths and weaknesses? 2.) What is the opposite extreme? Connecting to the part that wants the opposite of the present energetic extreme. 3.) Get the opposites to communicate with each other, to create a holistic and balanced perspective.
Let's explore this process through the example of a person who comes to counseling and is so irritated with their family. The family always wants so much of the person, and they always say yes. The person is struggling because they are so exhausted and yet also keep helping others so much.
In the first phase, we can see that this person is embodying an extreme on the doing, masculine, or yang energetic spectrum. This energy consists of working hard, being focused, and strong. When it is extreme it can become a pathology that shows up as overworking, burnout, or lacking boundaries from being too selfless. We connect with the way that extreme feels good in the client and the adaptive or heartfelt reasoning for reasoning in embodying themselves in this way, which can create a lot of healing by being seen and acknowledged. After we feel good about recognizing its strengths, we admit its weaknesses - "The overdoing is leading me to get super burned out and I can't say no!". We now have insight into a major part of our existence, we have gained insight into what this thing is and how it helps and hurts.
In the second phase, we get loose and imaginatively explore what it could or would look like to embody the opposite energy of extreme yang energy in the form of over-responsibility. We imagine never talking to anyone ever again, and we let in how good that may feel. We may feel good about all of the selfish images and energies that come to mind. This is a major part that is not getting spoken for because the first extreme is usually all we are typically connected to. By connecting to the opposite, we can admit to ourselves that we may want rest, that it could and would feel good. Clients may give these parts names, maybe "tough guy" and "lazy boy".
In the third phase, we bring the opposite extreme view to the present-day struggle and let these two extremes talk to one another. The lazy boy let's tough guy know that he enjoys naps and would feel like enough by doing just that. The tough guy barters with the lazy boy and speaks for the part of him that enjoys helping others. Ultimately, we come to a balanced view, where we keep the healthy desire to be selfless, and the typically unconscious desire to rest and relax. We have shifted our relationship to ourselves, and we can now hear that side of the energetic spectrum that may have been silent to us beforehand. We begin hearing the calls of our hearts in whatever form they manifest, embracing the authenticity of doing and non-doing.
We all have parts or perspectives of our humanity, and they each advocate for their own need and reality. Our pathology can sometimes exist because we are not consciously connected to all of who we are because of cultural stigma, how we were raised, or because we have found a few tricks that we have become overly reliant upon.
Holistic-Life Parts Work allows us to expand our definition of who we are, and embrace the wisdom of our bodies. It allows us to be comfortable in the natural cycle of our lives. We become clear, confident, and connected to the flow and pulse of our experience.
This is my framework and theory for addressing the perspective or "parts" that block us from accessing the fullness of who we are. It is a path towards embodying holistic well-being, the antithesis of unidimensional ways of being. We can access a sense of wholeness by being comfortable and connected to life. Holistic-Life Parts Work uses archetypal wisdom to create a framework for the energetic spectrum of existence. By getting clear on the energetic extreme present, connecting with its opposite, and having them integrate/work together we can leave energetic extremes behind and begin to live a balanced and whole life. The wholeness comes because we are no longer enslaved to an extreme, stuck with no choice but to keep on doing the same old same old. With more awareness about the energetic extremes and feeling them in our body, we can move between the two, using the wisdom of both sides as needed for the moment.
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